JENenergy--Life, Love, God and Other Stuff

 For weeks, I've been blogging and replying to a multitude of FB posts to STAY POSITIVE. Don't name call. Don't get angry. When people who are following other candidates say something horrible, don't reply! Unless it's with respect and kindness. I have had many positive responses to my plea. Sadly, I've received negative responses to this. too. I can't say this strongly or pleadingly enough--DO. NOT. GO. TO. THEIR. LEVEL. It is so hard to not get upset. My goodness! Lying, cheating--blatantly! Little to no honest mainstream media coverage. I mean, the list goes on and on. But so does Bernie. And so will we. Here's the thing: The people who have been planning this evil have been doing this for years, maybe decades. # Berners are a rather new (and amazing!) phenomenon. And we are rocking the boat! But as we gather tighter, closer, and more filled with love, passion and courage, that ball of light that is US (not me!) will dispel the darknes...

It is a few days after Bernie did not get the win we wanted in New York. And yet again, there were problems with voting. There were problems in Brooklyn, his stompin' grounds. There are lawsuits a-plenty. Am I being paranoid to say that something--AGAIN--smells fishy? I refuse to get discouraged. There are many true, honest, good people in place who are not going to stand for this and I consider myself to be one of them. And I know many thousands, tens of thousands, millions who are also insisting that we have honest elections. And I am so grateful. But I have to ask myself, how can winning the election be so important that either it's been handled poorly from stupidity, trying to save a buck (that isn't working out so well now, is it?) or because people have lied, are still lying? Isn't there value in honesty and integrity? Aren't these values a huge part of America? What is the cost of truth in voting? And how can we make sure that EVERY. VOTE...

New York. The Big Apple.  291 delegates This is an important contest for Bernie. Which is exciting! He will shine. And he will win . Why? Because he has rallied millions of people to believe we can heal our nation and is bringing us together for a better America. On Tuesday, April 19th, New Yorkers from the entire state are excited, filled with purpose, courage and love and will vote for Bernie to give him the win he deserves.   As we ponder this amazing opportunity to show our support for Bernie Sanders, we focus only on the good: Bernie's plan to change things for the better. The love and exuberance people feel being Bernie supporters. Seeing his campaign grow in momentum. Being kind to all and avoiding negativity toward any other opponents, candidates or those who don't agree with us. Love them. Forgive them. Don't worry about them. At. All. Do not dwell on what he needs. Only focus on what he will do and what we want and what he and we ar...

  Several years ago, I worked for a company and loved the work--at first. After I'd been hired, one of the people on my team (marketing) got 'let go' without any severance, but did get a good recommendation. Before he left, this man had told me the story of his hiring in the first place. He was known around the computer tech business as a cracker jack HTML guy. This company, I'll call it FFF, called him in a panic that their HTML guy had quit and they were in Big Trouble. He came in and saved the day. For two years, he saved the day. Then, with no notice, he had two weeks to work out a severance (huh???) and off he went. I was too new in my position to do anything more than ask a few quiet questions about it and the answers were sparse. I didn't know what was what. Yet. After a few months, a theme began to become clear to me. FFF was nothing but about money. Innocently, I discussed some issues and later realized these led to my downfall. They were: I naively...

  Today I sewed valences for my blinds. I spoke to my husband and my cousin. I walked my dogs. Fed my horses. And felt let down about the obvious, insidious, unacceptable corruption that has been going on during this election period. How can this happen? THIS IS AMERICA! I am just me, sitting at my computer in my home office in Utah County, Utah. What can I do? I can post. I can contribute. I can reach out to my fellow Berners.  And anyone else who will listen! AND I CAN BELIEVE. No--I can KNOW. For once in this crazy world, right can work. Because I have you. And you. And you. And you have me. I have never been to New York, but you New Yorkers, I am counting on you. We are all counting on you. Search your heart and get to the polls. Because you can count on us! And while you're at it, here is a high five, a smile and hug to you. We have the Power of Together. And it is amazing!

I've had a couple of bad days. These things happen to all Empaths, and as I am learning what to do when--over and over--the bad days can be not just difficult but disheartening. Today opened with a sunshiney smile. Our farrier said he'd be a little late, so I fiddled around for a while and then went to the pasture. I haltered my big horse Dude and got his feet trimmed. Then, my best friend Hank got his feet trimmed. He had his little problems like always, and my farrier, Will, said he thought some horses had a hard time when restrained and one foot held tight as it's being worked on. That made a lot of sense. Hank was a working stallion and needed all four feet on the ground at all times to take care of his herd. After his feet were trimmed, I got on him bareback. We walked back and forth in our pasture and I could feel myself get more and more grounded. I was able to not just calm down, but feel love, warmth, happiness, beauty for the first time in days. Inte...

In quick succession, I had two instances tonight that told me, "Um, yo Jen--trust your gut on this one." I won't detail what those things are--to protect those involved and so I don't look like a complete jerk. But I am amazed as I begin to really embrace being an Empath, how quickly things become clear. The first thing that happened was I remembered something from years ago. At the time, I thought it was pretty sketchy and I knew what I was being told wasn't right. The person telling me "the Truth" wasn't being honest and that "Truth" wasn't valid at all--I knew it. Now, years later, the real Truth comes out and yep--I was right to not believe it the first time. Sadly, at the time, I did finally accept what was being told to me, and that accepting and dozens like it have caused me to not trust myself. It is a sad day when an Empath can't trust her own instincts. I am in a different space now, allowing myself to think, feel,...

I was going to title this Haters Gonna Hate, but then realized, I am writing about the opposite of hatred, so why start out with hateful words? I had two things happen this weekend that troubled me. Every six months, my church, The Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-Day Saints has a semi-annual General Conference, the first weekend of October and the first weekend in April. It is well-attended in the church's beautiful Conference Center in Salt Lake City and broadcast all over the world. If you are a member of the Church, you can either see this live, on TV, or read it or watch it online soon after. God's word gets out QUICK! For those who don't know, General Conference goes on for two days. It's long. The bonus is--you can watch it on TV in your jammies. The schedule is 10-noon and 2-4 both Saturday and Sunday and 6-7:30 on Saturday night. That's a long weekend! One of the things that happens during the April Conference in the Saturday afternoon C...

I got on Facebook today to ask other Bernie supporters what they thought should happen with the whole Arizona voting and not voting and that whole thing . You know what? There are a lot of smart people backing Bernie and I am amazed, pleased, impressed and gratified because these people are coming up with solutions. So, for tonight, I leave it in their capable hands.   Tonight, I am grounding, meaning using oils, took the dogs for a walk, exercised, going to shower. I am weary with all the corruption. My heart has been heavy with the bombings in Brussels. Tonight, I need to ease my spirit. I did, however, LOVE the bird incident at Bernie's rally. L-O-V-E.

Many years ago, I knew a woman who'd been horribly abused by many of her family members. I remember watching her cry until I thought she would die of a broken heart. I wondered how she could endure this. Her family denied the abuse. Her siblings turned against her. She had issues with a capital *I*. I asked her once how she could handle all of it. She replied simply, "I stand for truth." That statement is one of the tenets that I have since embraced in my own life. I ask myself: does this help me stand for truth? If I stand for truth, how should I behave? At the end of this election experience, aka fiasco aka revolution, I know that my working for Bernie Sanders leads me to answer my own questions with yes. Does working for Bernie Sanders help me stand for truth? Yes. If I stand for truth, how should I behave? Support Bernie Sanders to ensure he becomes the next president of the United States of America. And so it is.

Today, as the dust settles on Bernie's fantastic victories in ID and UT and the sludge being dragged into the light about whatever it was that happened in Arizona and how can we fix it and will anyone even try to fix it, what I'm seeing is a lot of angry people. We all want to know what happened there--and elsewhere. Is the media not covering Bernie properly? Is Bernie as popular as Hillary? Or more? Things are getting stressed. My Hillary fan friends tell me all the reasons why she is so great, but in a rather vicious and almost superior way. Like, "Oh, you like Bernie. You're one of those. When you get more educated on the facts (meaning, reading the polls that favor Hillary), you'll see." My Bernie friends too are scrambling, looking for stats to prove he will be the president, which I actually think will happen. What troubles me is how easy it is to become negative toward others, even those on the same side (meaning those who share my admiratio...

It is midnight and I am finally settled after the wild ride hubs and I had at the UT caucus in Spanish Fork. First, I am so remarkably grateful we volunteered to take ballots and voter registration forms at the Democratic Caucus. It was a stampede! A wild, crazy, energy-filled caucus that brought voters out like crazy. I keep saying crazy. There's a reason. It was so much fun, smiling at everyone including some brand new shiny young voters, some people who had never voted before who were "older" and a gob of Republicans standing in a cold, cloudy night outside the junior high school to vote. One cute lady came in and said, "My hands are so cold! But I'm gonna vote!" One cute young man and his mother were so excited they took photos of themselves with their ballots. Darling! I was filled with such happiness to be part of something so historic, so filled with hope, such complete and utter fun. This guy was guiding people through the line. That guy was say...

  I woke up this morning with butterflies in my stomach. Tonight's the night! After all the hard work, hope, the community of it all--tonight is Utah's night. You see, as an actress, I know what having an important night means. In the acting world, it's opening night. You go to your audition and then you sit and wait. Did I get the part? Yes! Then you go to rehearsal after rehearsal, spend an inordinately insane time learning your lines. Your whole life sort of goes on hold in pursuit of finding your character. Tons. Of. Commitment. And then, opening night. You have trusted your director. You step onstage and hope you do your best. But the thing is, you hope your cast does well, too. You hope the audience is excited to be there, becomes engaged in your performance. You hope that all your hard work crystallizes into perfection--that you and all who are there find the success you've been planning for. And you count on everyone in that building to find and embrace...

My husband, Craig and I went to see Bernie Sanders again today. Yes, we saw him on Friday and as volunteers, were on our feet the whole day and came home and hibernated on Saturday. That night, we found out that Bernie was coming back. And so were we. Today's rally was indoors at a high school gym. It was packed. It was hot. It was awesome. Before the rally Though much of what he said was a repeat of his comments on Friday, listening to it a second time brought out different messages for me today. What touched me most was his praise, his understanding and his willingness to reach out  to all of us in that gym--all of us Utahns. I can't quote it perfectly, but basically he said: :Now, I understand that Utah is a Conservative state. But the people here are kind. They are good people." As he said "good" something hit me. What I loved about this small message was that he appreciates and values the people of Utah. He gets that we are from a long histor...

Last Friday, I went to a Bernie Sanders rally in Salt Lake City, Utah. I posted one of my impressions of that stupendous event on Facebook and it has been since shared hundreds of times. Here is the post: 3.18.16 I went to a rally for Obama in 2007 and it was amazing. Today's Bernie rally, however, touched me in a way nothing ever has before politically. He mentioned drugs. He mentioned heroin and how it's better to rehabilitate, not incarcerate. My son Nathan died from a heroin OD. With Bernie's comment about the seriousness of addiction and how it often kills, well, that was the first time I cried in the rally, but not the last. Bernie Sanders gets it. ‪ RIP Nathan Kelly   #‎ berniegetsit‬  #feelthebern

I am writing this post because I feel it's essential that I share my dual messages today, the week before Easter Sunday and two days away from our UT caucus. I send this message for the purpose of standing up for my beliefs and for you to share. If any of these views are not in keeping with your own beliefs, please do not reply or try to argue with me. I appreciate your caring for me, your other differing ideas and understanding and respect them. I am happy you are secure in your spiritual, religious and political ideals and applaud you for coming to these important tenets in your life. I ask you again, please do not comment in the negative about what I am saying in this post. Please do not personal message me. I am writing this post to tell my story and if it resonates with you or others you know who can benefit from it, invite you to share it. I am a convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I converted when I was 16. I believe it, love it and embrac...